If you’re not happy today, then you won’t be happy tomorrow unless you take things into your own hands and take action. – Sonja Lyubomirsky

I believe it’s safe to say that we all want to be happy. If we think about it, our behaviours are mainly motivated by wanting to feel pleasure and happiness. However, pursuing happiness is not easy.

I remember struggling so much to be happy in the past, no matter how hard I try. And when I finally felt happiness, it was fleeting.

But when I learned about these factors influencing our levels of happiness, it all made sense. I understood why it was such an uphill battle for me to feel positive emotions.

Aside from wanting to be happy, there’s also the question of increasing happiness once we achieve it. Is it even possible?

It turns out it’s possible to increase happiness and stay happy. However, it isn’t easy because of these reasons:

• Genetics influence happiness.

Please don’t blame your parents if they’re not a happy bunch. Unfortunately, you have no control over the genes you inherit from them.

• Happiness is a lifelong trait.

Our personality doesn’t change much over time. If you’re one of those naturally happy kids in school (compared to your peers), most likely, you’ll still be happier compared to them today.

• Happiness can be fleeting due to hedonic adaptation.

Eventually, we take the positive things in our lives for granted because we’ve adapted or got used to them.

For instance, think about the positive things in your life that no longer bring you the same level of happiness as when you first got or experienced them. (For example, when you bought the bag, car, phone, or clothes you coveted, when you received a promotion or salary increase, got the job you want, got married, purchased a new home, etc.). Over time, these “new shiny things” lose their shine.

Nevertheless, despite these reasons or hindrances, happiness is still generally under our control. Because of it, it is still possible for us to become happier. I’ll explain later how you can do it.

But first, let me share with you the main factors affecting your happiness.

The three major factors influencing your happiness

1. Genetics

As previously mentioned, genetics influence our happiness.

According to research, approximately 50% of the differences among people’s happiness levels can be attributed to genetically determined set points. The set point that we inherit from our parents significantly influences how happy we will be.

If it comes naturally for your parents to be happy, presumably, it feels like a natural state for you too.

2. Life Circumstances

 Life circumstances, or what happens to us, account for about 10% of the variance in a person’s happiness levels. Life circumstances include being rich or poor, healthy or unhealthy, being married or divorced, being in a happy or abusive relationship, etc.

If you’re in a terrible life circumstance, this factor will be more impactful. For example, suppose you’re unemployed and living in extreme poverty or in a very abusive environment. In that case, this will have more impact on your happiness than genes and intentional activities.

3. Intentional Activities

While we have no control over the genes we inherit and only some control over our life circumstances, this is the factor that we have the most control over.

Intentional activities, or the way we think and behave daily, explain about 40% of the differences among people’s happiness levels.

If we engage in wellbeing enhancing mental and physical habits every day, we can increase our levels of happiness. Knowing this made me optimistic that lasting happiness is attainable because we have control over (and can change) the way we think, our behaviours, and habits.

It’s important to note that all three factors interact and influence each other and even overlap. Further, the percentages given per factor are simply approximations or rough estimates.

What we do daily (intentional activities) affect our life circumstances and even gene expression. (Genes can be expressed or not depending on what happens in our lives). Our genes also influence our tendency to perform certain activities that will make us happier (e.g. exercise, perform acts of kindness, pursuing goals). These intentional activities influenced by our genes will then impact our life circumstances and our happiness.

Positive activities or Wellbeing promoting activities

Here are some examples of intentional activities that you can do to increase your levels of happiness:

• Perform acts of kindness. You’ll get more happiness boost if you do a lot in one day (versus a few scattered in different days).
• Practice gratitude or count your blessings. You can also use a gratitude journal.
• Write gratitude letters – thank those who helped you or made your life better.
• Express gratitude. Say thank you whenever the situation warrants it.
• Apply mindfulness in everything you do. Enjoy the present moment.
• Visualize your best possible self. How do you think and behave when you’re at your best?
• Commit to life-long goals and ambitions. Pursue your dreams and passions.
• Savour life’s pleasures – even simple ones like a cup of coffee or a warm bath.
• Relish and replay happy days. Visualize what happened in detail, including how you felt.
• Live life like it’s your last month. How would you make an impact and make your life extraordinary? What would you like to accomplish? Who would you spend more time with?
• Practice optimism when imagining the future.
• Challenge yourself and learn something new. Is there a new skill you’d like to develop?
• Engage in regular physical exercise. Be active – walk, run, dance.
• Offer help to others. You can also do volunteer or charity work.
• Spend quality time with your family and friends. Connect and do something fun together.

Everyone is different. So keep trying various wellbeing enhancing activities to see what works for you. Also, don’t forget to put effort into it, as well as consistency and variety.

It’ll also be helpful to choose positive activities that align with your values, your personality, and you find meaningful and enjoyable. In this way, you’ll be motivated, and it’ll feel more natural for you to engage in it every day.

Remember, we can successfully pursue happiness and increase our happiness levels. Still, we have to commit to working on it daily. As the great Greek philosopher, Aristotle once said: “Happiness depends upon ourselves”.    

Key Takeaway

According to research, three significant factors influence our happiness. These factors are the genetic set point for happiness that we inherit from our parents (genetics), what happens in our lives (life circumstances), and the way we think and behave (intentional activities). All three factors have a substantial influence on our wellbeing.

We all want to be happy, feel pleasure and enjoy life. And although it’s not easy to pursue happiness, in general, we still have great control over how happy we will be. We even can increase our levels of happiness by doing positive activities or wellbeing promoting activities every day. Further, because what we think and do matters, lasting happiness depends on the daily mental and behavioural habits we choose to engage in. So choose to think and behave in ways that support your wellbeing.

Now It’s Your Turn

1. Reflection: Are you happy? If not, what could be causing your unhappiness, and what actions can you take to be happier?

2. Action Step: Choose five from the list above of positive activities or wellbeing promoting activities and try them for at least a week. How did it make you feel? Which ones worked for you?

Thank you for reading! Please leave a comment below and share your thoughts. Which of the three factors influencing your levels of happiness has the most impact on your wellbeing?

References

Lyubomirsky. S. (2019 July 18-21). Revisiting the Happiness Pie Chart: The Science of Interventions Aimed at Increasing Wellbeing [Conference Presentation]. International Positive Psychology Association Convention, Melbourne, Australia.

Langley Group Institute. 2018. Happiness Pie: Happiness Levels. Sydney, Australia: Langley Group.